DEPARTURE
by Patcat
Summary: In response...


DEPARTURE

"Ok, Goren," Alex Eames said skeptically. "You take me out to my favorite place for lunch…You encourage me to order the most expensive thing on the menu…And you order my favorite dessert…And you barely touch your own lunch…What's going on?"

Bobby tore at the fourth napkin he'd destroyed in an hour.

"And you're shredding paper like a dog shedding fur in the summer," Alex commented.

"You…You know that there's just been a shake-up in the Counter Terrorism Unit," Bobby said.

"Yea…" A pang of fear appeared in Alex's stomach.

"A guy…I know him from the Army…He joined it several years ago," Bobby explained. As he spoke, the napkin became smaller and smaller pieces of paper. "He's come up its ranks…He's always told me…Wanted me…He's in charge of the shakeup now and reviving the unit. He…He's made me a formal offer…"

The pang became a heavy weight.

"I…I haven't told him anything," Bobby said hastily. "I…I wanted to talk to you. You…You're really the only person to talk to…"

"Does Ross know?"

Bobby shook his head. "Not unless there's been some gossip…But my contact…Associate…We've always gotten along really well, but to call him a friend would be a huge exaggeration…But he's always been very good at playing things close to the vest…I suspect he and I…and now you…are the only people who know…"

Alex stared at the gooey chocolate remains of her dessert. It lay heavily in her stomach, and she wished that she hadn't ate so much so quickly. "It could be a great opportunity for you, Bobby. It'd get you away from Moran and his vendettas. You'd get to use more of your skills. You'd get noticed in the right way."

"Maybe…" The napkin was completely destroyed, and Bobby began fidgeting with his spoon. "But I wouldn't get to use some of my skills. There'd be other Brass to deal with…And you had lots of chances…Great ones…In the past years…And you didn't take them…And…Like you…I didn't take this job to get noticed…"

"So…What is this? You want my blessing?" She tried to keep any anger or bitterness out of her voice.

"I…I suppose so," Bobby said feebly. He rubbed the back of his neck. "This was a lot easier when I was practicing it…"

"When did he ask you?"

"Yesterday evening…He called me after work…I didn't get much sleep," Bobby said.

"You…You talked to me first…" Alex wondered.

"Of course…Like I said…You're the only one to talk to…"

"It…It's a good move for you…"

"There were lots of good moves for you, and you didn't take them." Bobby leaned forward. "Why didn't you take them?"

"I…I liked it at Major Case," Alex said. "Anyway, we're talking about you here, not me…"

"I…I think we're talking about us," Bobby said slowly. "When…When I was suspended…I got other offers…In spite of the suspension, and my reputation…There were other jobs…"

Alex nodded. "I know Deakins wanted you to join the firm he's with…"

"And…And I realized…" He concentrated on rearranging his silverware. "Why…Why I wanted to come back to Major Case…Why it was so important…It wasn't just pride and showing Moran and others that I was a good cop…It…It was you…I wanted to work with you…I…I wanted to be with you…"

Alex's heart weighed roughly the same as a chunk of iron.

"I…I know it's not fair…I know I shouldn't lay so much on you," Bobby said. "But…But you were the best partner…The best cop…And such…such a good person…And somewhere along the line…I don't know if there's a word for what I feel…Feel about you…It's all so complicated and the personal and the professional are all wrapped up together…But when he made the offer to me last night I realized the worst possibility about accepting it was that I wouldn't get to see and be with you…And the best possibility about it…Better than the job or getting away from the Chief of Ds or anything…Was that…Was that I could…Could be with you in other ways…"

Alex looked up at Bobby. He couldn't meet her eyes. He was pale and shaking and there were tears in his eyes. She had never seen him so scared, even when she woke to find him at her bedside in the hospital after Jo Gage's attack on her. His courage in the face of his greatest terror gave her strength.

"You," she said.

He shook as if he'd been hit and looked up at her. "What…"

"You. You're why I stayed. One reason I felt so betrayed when you went undercover and didn't tell me…Was because I'd stayed to be with you. You made me a better cop…A better person…And somewhere along the line…Like you…I couldn't…Still can't…Figure out what we have…"

"We?"

"Yea…We…"

"You…I love you…" He swallowed, and Alex realized how much the words cost him.

"I love you," she said.

His large hand shot out to cover hers, and its warmth flooded over her. "I…I want to do what will make you happy…But…" Tears began to streak his cheeks. Alex reached out to brush them away.

"Let's…Let's talk about that," she said, feeling her own tears well in her eyes.

"Ok…"

"But one thing…I get to tell Ross…I can't wait to see his expression…"

END

This was therapy of a sort, in response to news. There has been a recent shakeup at the NYPD Anti-Terrorism Unit, by the way.


End file.
